Am I missing out?

I’m finally sitting at the beach after I made it an urgency—because I came to the realization that I take everything seriously, just not myself. So now I’m at the beach—at Dreamland, by the way—which I realize is very close to my home if you take the route before you drive down the shortcut hill. And what happened? I feel like I’m missing out. What the fuck?!

I finally made it to the beach after such a long time of never allowing myself to do that because I was “too busy”, and today I’m here, the sun is finally out—and something is still not good? Still not enough?

I’m watching the surfers surfing, and I realized that I also wanna surf and that I know it’s my passion. But honestly, I can’t have everything at the same time. I was blaming myself for not surfing as often as I did when I’d been here before. But you know what? The last time, I also didn’t have the podcast running. The last time, I wasn’t investing my time and energy in thinking about how I can turn my passion—which is helping people reconnecting with their truest selves—into making a living out of it.

And yes, you could still say that with the right time management, I could have found a way to do it. And yes, I know—I could have. But you know what? It was simply not my priority this time, and the fear of big waves is still here, which I’ve noticed is also holding me back sometimes. But that’s okay. I don’t have to always push over my boundaries in everything and everywhere. Because if we always focus on pushing harder and achieving more, then how do we wanna find peace in the moment that lies in front of us—which is the beautiful beach I’m sitting at right now, which is the sun that is shining on me, which are the waves I’m listening to.

Yes, pushing beyond your boundaries and stepping out of your comfort zone is good. But taking a break and allowing yourself to simply be present in this very moment is where I believe the power lies.

Three hours later, I booked a surf lesson for the next day.

And you know how I felt? Excited.